I’ve been thinking a lot lately about what it means to be a stay-at-home mom—and how freaking hard it is. I love my husband, but let’s be real: he doesn’t always get it. He’s an introvert, and I think sometimes he assumes I’ve got the better end of the deal being home. But honestly? It’s exhausting.
Juggling Kids, Work, and My Own Sanity as a Stay-at-Home Mom
I work from home about 25 hours a week as a Virtual Assistant—a total God-send, honestly. The flexibility makes it possible to manage a household of six (and sometimes up to nine) kids. But while I’m grateful, I don’t love the work itself. I love my clients. I love serving them. But I don’t feel like I’m growing.
And I need growth. I crave progress.
What Do You Want to Be When You Grow Up?
I spent the last year and a half trying to figure out what I want to do when I grow up (lol), and to be completely honest — it’s been hard. It’s required deep vulnerability, which isn’t always comfortable. But like Brené Brown says, vulnerability is the birthplace of creativity and growth — and I’ve had to lean all the way in.
It hasn’t been easy. In fact, it’s been downright depressing at times.
I started a marketing agency in 2017. By 2020, it was really growing, and 2022 felt like my breakthrough year—until life threw a curveball. My husband got promoted and we had to move across town. On paper, it didn’t sound like much. But in the Phoenix area, going from the East Valley to the West Valley is like moving to another state. Suddenly I was an hour away from my community, my clients, and my networking base.
And just like that, I lost every client. One by one.
Starting Over (Again)
That season broke me a bit. But I had to keep going. We needed the income, so I started applying for jobs—something I had hoped never to do again. Eventually, I landed a role as a VA in June 2023. It’s been a blessing, but I’ve always known it was temporary.
That summer, my husband and I decided I’d go back to school and apply for PA (Physician Assistant) school. It felt like the next chapter… until October 2024, when I found out I didn’t even land an interview.
Cue another spiral.
Wrestling with Identity
For the first time, I really had to face the thought: Am I just going to be a mom?
Yes, I know—being a mom is the most important job in the world. But I’ve never wanted just that. I’ve always wanted both: to be a mom and have a career. I want my kids to see that women can do both. I want my daughters to know they’re more than just mothers. I want my sons to one day support and respect their wives’ ambitions.
Being a Stay-at-Home-Mom: Raising Kids, Holding Dreams
Parenting is hard. Parenting six kids full-time—from toddler to teenager—is borderline wild. Add in the complexities of trauma, foster care, and blended family dynamics, and it’s more than most people could imagine.
I don’t have all the answers, but I know this: I still want more. I still expect more from myself.
So I’m leaning back into the basics. Asking big questions. Digging deep. And learning that I can be a mom and have goals. And so can you.
This is just the beginning of Behind Brave & Blended, a blog series where I’ll be pulling back the curtain on what this journey has really looked like — from rediscovering my voice, to learning from authors who kept me grounded, to navigating the complexities of becoming a Second Mom.
Stay tuned for the next post: “Mom Can Have Goals Too.”
With love and courage,
Lindsey
P.S. Are you need of encouragement in your Second Mom journey? Download our new FREE 5-Day Devotinal now!